Diaries always know what's in your heart. Even when you're 24.

It was one of those nights. One of those nights where you want to tear out your hair. Every. Last. Strand.  Where nothing seems to be going right.  The toddler's screaming because he just woke up from a nap.  The preschoolers are dumping out every tub of toys they can get their hands on. Your dog's getting into the trash bag full of everything you just swept up from behind the dryer.  You find the sippy cups stashed under your preschooler's bed because he didn't want to stop playing to put them in the sink. And then you turn around and your child is getting into the drawers on your bedside... the one where you keep things that you find precious. And then it happened...

He brought me my old diary.  The one I wrote in during middle school.  The one with the hearts in the corners, and my name written with Luke's last name.  It happened just at the right time. I could feel the break down rising.  But then I opened it up to find the following passage:

"Someday my dream will come true. Someday we'll be married.  We'll have a house of our own. I can see our child running down the hallway, yelling out my name.  Crying out tears that only I can wipe away because I'll be their source of comfort.  Someday.  Someday will be perfect."

That someday is today.  And today is perfect.

Sometimes we just need to remember to take a moment to be thankful for all we have.  I did marry the love of my life.  We may not own a house, but we have a house.  We have a roof over our heads.  And that house?  Its full to the brim of love and life.  Of little hands grabbing at us and wanting us to play games. To push little trains through tunnels.  To go outside and blow bubbles.  And yes, sometimes needing the comfort that only a parent can bring.  These days are to cherish.

There will be another someday.  The someday where all this time is gone.  Where they will have houses of their own.  Little voices calling for them.  And this, this will all be a memory of time gone by.  Today is what we have.  And I vow to make the most out of every moment possible.

Because one day he won't fit in this towel... My bathroom will stay clean... The toilet paper will stay in it's spot. Because one day, I'll miss this.